How I Used Medical Astrology to Search for a Diagnosis

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Inside: When confused and looking for a way forward in life, you’ll look to anyone for answers. Read on to find out what happened when I visited an astrologer in Nashville and just how accurately he predicted my future.


I saw an astrologer last week named Thomas Parsons. He was recommended to me by a friend who insisted that she had been going to him for years, and he had correctly predicted the outcome of her relationship.

After visiting the Amish Iridologist, I’ll admit I was skeptical. But again, I’m lost and looking for answers, so what the hell?

I was curious to see where he envisioned the next year of my life. It’s only $90 and you receive a 3-hour appointment, 2 CDs (the appointment is taped so you can listen to it later) and a full year’s worth of daily astrological reports. This really was a steal…

The Appointment with Thomas Parsons

I show up at his house at 9:30 AM and the first question he asks me as soon as I walk in is:

“Do you have a boyfriend?”

“Nope.”

“Ok, good.”

For the first hour, he describes what the 12 houses are and how he created my birth chart, based on the time and location of my birth. He explains that for every person born, there is a 4-minute window where the planets and stars are in a perfect alignment that can dictate the rest of someone’s life.

I wasn’t expecting Thomas Parsons to tell me that I was about to meet the man that I would marry.

I listen intently and wait for him to get to the real reason that I’m there.

Next, he looks down at a piece of paper with red and black markings on it and looks back up at me and asks:

“When is the last time that you received a raise?”

Surprised, I tell him that I found out just the day before that I would be receiving a raise. I had just put in my two-weeks notice on that previous Friday, and my boss countered—so no matter what option I took, it would result in a higher paycheck.

He tells me that I should take the next job and goes on to say that I’m only at the beginning of a major life transformation that will last for the next two years.

Oh, you don’t say…

Here’s the best part – He tells me that I need to take the job, because not only am I going to be happier with the new challenges, but that I’m going to meet the man that I marry there.

He’s confident that I, without a doubt, will meet my husband during the next year. He goes on to describe in detail the characteristics of my future husband, including:

  1. He’s smart.
  2. He’s well-cultured and traveled.
  3. He’s 5-6 years older than me.
  4. He has letters after his name.
  5. He may speak another language.
  6. He grew up around an ocean.
  7. We will end up moving to either Denver, Portland, Seattle or somewhere with an ocean for the backyard.

OK, so this man doesn’t know a single detail about my life. He only met me one hour ago.

He could have described a jacked, meat head that goes to church every Sunday or the drummer of a band who plays shows downtown every Saturday – Neither of which, I would be into.

He goes on to describe how my future husband will treat me (using the phrase “put you on a pedestal”) and that he foresees us getting engaged by next holiday season and moving in together in early 2019.

I wasn’t expecting Thomas Parsons to tell me that I was about to meet the man that I would marry. I, more or less, wanted an update on the state of my nearly non-usable hands.

He said that somewhere in 2018 I will have an unexpected expense and follows it up with the question:

“Is someone in your family sick?”

I reply, “Yes, kind of…”

He asks me to elaborate, so I tell him that doctors think I may have a form of ALS and that, for the moment, we’re at a standstill.

He looks at my chart and then looks back at me and exclaims:

“No, this is definitely not you. I see confusion, but I definitely do not see ALS anywhere on this chart. You’re up and dancing through possibly the best next year of your life. How could you be doing that if someone is moving you around in a wheelchair?”

Needless to say, I left the appointment on Cloud 9.

Final Thoughts On Seeing Thomas Parsons

Later that night, I updated my friend about how the appointment with Thomas Parsons went.

While telling her a brief summary, the girl sitting beside me at dinner rolled her eyes and said:

“He told you what?”

Hmm…that’s weird, because I don’t remember asking for your thoughts on the subject?

Here’s the thing – People believe in God, Allah, Jesus, Moses, Buddha, etc. Have you ever met or personally known someone who has met any of these individuals that millions of people around the world believe to have existed? No. Does that make it any less valid? No.

NO ONE FUCKING KNOWS WHAT’S REAL AND WHAT ISN’T.

There’s not one person on this Earth that can tell you what happens after we die. No one can tell us if astrology is real. No one can say whether Karma really does exist.

No one.

Therefore, why do we look at peoples’ beliefs and judge them based against our own belief systems?

Believing in Christianity isn’t any less weird than believing in astrology. Both belief systems are founded on ancestral texts claiming unproven facts.

I’m not saying that I completely agree with the astrologer. All I’m saying is that there was a 3-day halo effect where I was happy believing that there was no way I could have a form of ALS.

Where religion can be a source of happiness and support for a lot of people, so can other unproven forms of belief.

Do you believe in astrology? Have you ever seen an astrologer? Comment below and let me know what you think about astrology!

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Allie Schmidt
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Allie Schmidt is a rare disease advocate and disabled mom living with motor neuron disease. She founded Disability Dame in 2020 to provide tips to other moms living with disabilities and chronic illnesses.

In her spare time, you can find her traveling with her husband (she's been to 38 states and 16 countries!), watching reruns of Survivor, or tending to her near-constant sunburn from spending too much time outside. You can follow her adventures here.

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